Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Fear and Loathing in Iowa

(author's note: read this blog while listening to Cyndi Lauper's the Goonies Are good Enough)

When you think of Iowa the terms to describe it often elude you. Fun and excitement are definately not words that come to mind; or at least I thought.

I was in search of a roller skating rink, what I found was far more exciting.

The bus dropped me off in front of Danny's Diner where apparently the local favorite is beer battered pickles and goat cheese. I recommend the ham and grits. As I left the diner I saw something I hadn't played since I was a kid...Twister!! Left foot red, right foot concrete! Twister only entertains you for so long so after about 190 seconds I decided I needed a cocktail. I strolled along looking at the shops, the tree, the cows and my life when I finally came to The Wild Rose Pub. I went in and was shocked that Iowa does in fact know how to make a tasty Red Headed Slut. After about two hours, I just couldnt take it anymore. I was tired, depressed, still in Iowa and for god's sake where in the hell was the roller rink?!?!
Staggering down the street I came to a bridge and I said to myself, this is it. I didn't see a rink anywhere and all this booze is clouding my judgement....I must jump!!! As I stood there about ready to leap into the water below I looked up and saw the most amazing thing I've ever seen in my life!!!

HOLY SHIT!!!





GAMBLING!!!!







The answer to all of my problems. This was it! I no longer needed a roller rink. I had the World Famous Iowa Queen River Boat Casino .

So let this be a lesson to you, just because you can't find what you think you need in life, like a roller rink, doesn't mean that at the end of the day and 20 cocktails later something better and equally as enjoyable wont come along.

What's Hybie Wearing:
Slow Kitchen Balloon Skirt Blue (80L)
Chaisuki Joanna Oriental Tan Skin (977L)
Parallel Love Tube Top 7 colors (1L)
Mirai Style Iseb Darkbrow Hair (200L)
HOC Chunky Stiletto Pumps (10L)
HOC Glasses Rectangle Frame (50L)
Nosotras Danger Leopard Tattoo (TTLG Gift)
Savoir Faire Shapes Elizabeth Special Edition Shape (1500L)

Stay tuned for Confessions of a Gambling Addict,

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